I had a conversation with someone near and dear to me about a man she’s dating.  They’ve been back and forth for years. They’ve been through all kinds of ups and downs, even to the extinct of violence. They have no children together but there is a child involved.  From the outside looking in the relationship seems toxic but it’s not my life to live.
The two of them have broken up but now he wants her back.  Because I have been in a similar situation I had to ask her, “If you take love out of the equation would you still want to be with him?”.  I ask this question because I remember having to answer it for myself.  Women maybe even some men tend to feel like they can’t let go of a bad relationship because of the love they feel.  To that I say, “what does love have to do with it?”  Just because you love someone doesn’t mean that person is good for you.  Love yourself more.  Love yourself enough to want the best for you. Someone who will promote you growth and advancement and bring happiness to your life.
It’s always hard to start something new so we stick with what we know.  You know this persons good and bad so you say to yourself, “I know what to expect from this one, if I go find someone new I have to start all over and who knows what new mess I’ll have to deal with.” After the first question is answered  my next question to her was, “do you want to be with him out of habit or because he is truly good for you?”.

Yes change is different and can be scary but are YOU worth the risk? You sit back and say you want someone better and know that you deserve better but how will you ever get better when your door is blocked by that rotten board.  Fight for YOU!  Love YOU enough to take the risk of finding what you really deserve. After all no one will love you more or better than you can.  When you begin truly loving yourself you will settle for nothing less and those you encounter will love you right.  Remember we teach people how to treat us.

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