Lick it Like a Lollipop…

Have you heard the statement, “If you see a sucker lick it”?  Basically meaning if a person is going to let you get away with something then go for it.  I’ve been guilty of using it but I myself have treaded lightly when it comes to putting it to use because in my opinion there’s a fine line you walk there ESPECIALLY when it comes to matters of the heart.

Because so many of us are selfish and we want what we want, we often times don’t consider the other person’s feelings before we do what we do and/or we don’t consider the long term effects.  Prime example, from my own life and so many around me:

We women really like a guy and let him know that we’re looking for a mate. (remember we LET HIM KNOW because some women will lie and say they’re not. I’m not talking about her kind right now.) We get intimate with this guy but he CONSTANTLY tells us that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship.  Now his actions are all types of relationship actions but he remains singing the same ol song, “I don’t want to be in a relationship”.  Yeah we women hear that but we’re focused on his actions because we like him and we tell ourselves all kinds of stories as to how he’s just holding back because of this or that baggage he has. How he’s just saying that because he’s scared to admit how he really feels because he doesn’t want to be hurt….yadda, yadda, yadda.  All this time we’re professing our love to him and telling him how we feel and he’s still saying he doesn’t want t relationship.  Time passes….He moves on….We get PISSED and feel like he did us so wrong.

****BAM!!****Now some women might lose their minds, flip out and make life a living hell for the man. Some may just do something real hurtful to him and some may just walk away and deal with the pain. All the while the man is feeling like what’s wrong with her, she’s crazy, this girl is tripping, and I told her I didn’t want a relationship. ****RIGHT HERE!*****  What do you see as the problem here?  Most would say the female was all wrong and while I agree that she definitely has to take some blame I have to also say we can’t take blame away from the man.  I feel he has to be held responsible as well for not having some self-control and being able to NOT get involved with her when she said she wanted a relationship and he KNEW he didn’t want one.  Just because she allowed you to “lick her sweetness” didn’t mean you had to.

As a friend of mine told me so many years ago, “when it comes to matters of the heart you never know what to expect” and I have found that to be true.  From watching the news, people around me and my own personal experiences, I have come to believe that when it comes to emotions expect the unexpected especially when they’re HURT emotions. So if/when that woman “wigs out” on you remember YOU chose to lick that lollipop so don’t be mad that once you bit it the gum in the center was hard.

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3 comments

  1. Sometimes… women hear what they want to hear. What can anyone do?

    Most women respond on an emotional level, instead of a logical level. So if she’s happy, everything is great! When she’s upset, everyone gets out of her way. Women are intuitive and able to pick up these cues and be in tune with other women’s feelings. Guys are clueless sometimes, and end up saying something or doing something that makes the situation worse.

    Other times, women can be straight up unfair. I’ll give you an example. A long time ago, my girlfriend and I were supposed to meet up for a dinner party. I waited over an hour, and wasn’t to reach her at all. Finally when she called back, she explained that she fell asleep at the library and her phone ran out of batteries. I was upset because our evening plans were spoiled. The following day, she gave me the silent treatment due to the fact that she was mad at me because I was mad at her. <_< What the… ??

    Over the years, I've learned that many times, women don't even know what it is they want. They may say that they desire one thing, but then do something completely opposite. Keeping along the same logic, if a guy chases a girl, she would think he is after sex and her walls go up. So when a guy says, "Hey, I don't want a serious relationship," then the pressure is off. She hears that he's not trying to go after her, so her walls come down and so does her underwear.

    The frustration in all of this is the practice of dishonesty. When you're not being truthful to each other (and especially yourself), you're only setting up the fall to disappointment.

    Good entry! You got me going there. Haha

    • You are so on point with your reply and I believe what it all boils down to is that people tend to lie to themselves and I hate to say it but I think women do it more often than men. Now maybe that’s not true and it only seems that way because men are able to better keep their emotional side in check BUT usually men say what they mean OR they’ll flat out lie purposely. Women I think lie about what they want as a defense (walls) and don’t even realize they’re doing it because they’ve convinced themselves that it’s the truth. Smh….

      As far as your girlfriend’s scenario, yeah she was wrong and that was so ridiculous.

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