1. He doesn’t see a difference from how you live now. If you are living together and/or have a sexual relationship, your man may not see the need to get married. They can enjoy the benefits of marriage without the commitment.
2. He worries that your relationship will change. Marriage does change the dynamics of a relationship, because it involves more responsibilities, compromise, and commitment. However, if you work together at your marriage, you’re likely to fall even more in love.
3. He doesn’t want to face any big life changes. Men worry that their lives will dramatically change once they’re married: they won’t get to hang out with the guys or leave the house a little messy.
4. He doesn’t want to think about the financial risk of divorce. Divorce is painful and difficult, especially if you have been married for a long time and have many possessions. The risk of losing lots of money and going through the painful ordeal is often enough to keep men from thinking of marriage.
5. He wants to make sure you’re his soul mate. When making such a big commitment, men want to be absolutely sure that they’ve found the one and that she’s not still out there waiting for him to meet her. But men need to realize that they aren’t going to get a sign from heaven pointing to their girlfriend. They have to be ready to commit to the one they’ve chosen to be with in the present.
6. He doesn’t face social pressures to marry. Men don’t have the same pressure of the “biological clock” that women face in their 30s. Unmarried men are more socially acceptable than unmarried women. Just think of the stereotypes: he’s a Don Juan, while women are called old maids and spinsters.
7. He wants to have a stable job and a house before getting married. Men want to be able to provide for their wives and be established financially. They don’t want to appear as if they’re relying on others to get by.
8. He doesn’t want to marry someone who already has kids. Men don’t want to feel as if they are in competition with the biological father, especially if they are thinking about having their own kids. They also may not feel ready to immediately take on the responsibilities of being a father in addition to a husband.
9. He’s not ready to start a family. The idea of starting a family can be very daunting to a man. They may feel that marriage will lead directly to having kids, which will impact the relationship with his wife. He may also feel that he’s not ready to be a father.
10. He wants to enjoy single life for as long as he can. Some men feel that getting married will crush their independence and freedom. They may have their own routines and habits that they don’t want to change. Or they may not want to give up having their own bachelor pad. What men need to realize is that marriage isn’t the end to fun and games – marriage can lead to new experiences that leave him feeling freer than ever before, with a loving wife at his side.
Post by Lindsey Webber
- The devalued state of marriage (pinklilliesandbg.com)