The Thrill of the Chase…Men vs Women

Recently I’ve been thinking, we always talk about men being hunters and loving the chase when it comes to women.  How once they’ve captured the woman they seem to loose interest and things seem to change drastically or they simply leave.  Because men seem to always be under scrutiny we hear a lot about them and the things they do but right now I’m wondering about us women.  Do you think we tend to be slightly addicted to the thrill of the chase as well?

Because I am somewhat of a researcher, with this question in mind, I of course turned to the World Wide Web to see what I could find out on the subject.  I ran across the following, what I thought to be insightful, post:

…The Thrill of The Chase in women for men is unreasonable. The two “Chases” are different. Men chase women that they do not have a relationship with. It is new. It is unknown. The woman that is being chased could also be curious about the man chasing her. The male chase has the potential to lead to a relationship or better yet a sexcapade. (Sexcapade = Free sex. No work, no commitment, no chance at a fullfiling relationship.) The woman is not chasing a new man or a new relationship. Too often, the woman is chasing a proven to be bad man or a proven to be failed relationship. Man’s Chase has potential. Woman’s Chase lacks potential (the relationship has already failed once if not twice or thrice). The Thrill of The Chase in women actually is a chase. He is leaving, you want him to stay. He is cheating, you want him to stop. He doesn’t want you, YOU . . . CAN’T . . . STOP . . . WANTING . . . HIM. (excerpt from a post by sjDixon )

I think he may be on to something here. Before I read this I was thinking of women chasing men in the same aspect as men chasing women but after reading it I must say he’s provided me a new perspective.  I think this is in part due to our nurturing side. We always want to help someone, solve their issues and make excuses for why they are the way they are.  We seem to have a problem with accepting that if it smells like a dog and barks like a dog, then dammit it’s a dog and we need to run like hell before we end up needing a flea dip.  Another thing he said that we all need to remember and etch into our brains is:

I remember that men can change. Men can grow and evolve. Men can be great husbands and fathers. But your man has to want to be a great husband or father. You can’t want it for him. A woman’s encouragement of a man to be greater means almost nothing if that man does not want to or think that he can be great…

With all of this being said I think as hard as it may be, due to the hard wiring of us women, we need to rewire ourselves to better function in reality. Love ourselves the most and stop trying to chase and encourage men who are not mentally ready or prepared.  Let it go!  Encourage ourselves to be great and those men who truly are ready to achieve greatness will come chase us because he’ll be able to see from the way we carry ourselves that greatness is all we’ll accept, no fire hydrants around our way so all dogs can keep it moving .



  1. Let’s just point to why this chase is able to stop us in it’s tracks.. If you are completely mind driven and have incessant brain chatter. Pursuit is much like mountain climbing (the chase whether it be a man or a woman).. You truly have to be in the present moment to achieve success. The problem arises when the climb no longer suits you and you only achieved a view that you are ok with never realizing you aren’t at the top. You will never climb higher.. because of this very thing. You then get to sit in this view and enjoy it for moments at a time only to start knit picking at the view you have achieved inside yourself. You will only see this view from this angle.. Meaning you never truly get the 3 dimensional view to understand why you should keep climbing. I hope that makes sense for it does when you realize why you chased nirvana for a period of time only to keep rock climbing elsewhere.

      • The more you share a present moment with someone who is trying to connect with you the more you connect. Then you will try and think you way into capturing this over and over. It is not that you know this you can’t see it cause you spend more time stating why doesn’t he.. what doesn’t she!

      • you continually will be trapped in the recesses of the mind patterns that kept you separate during your time here. When you equate a relationship with time you now are subject to the laws of your own mind not the other person hence why this same thing continues to gravitate in the same direction of relationship and relationship.

  2. Dogs are nice. Clean their poo and keep them free of fleas: a happy dog.

    I would love to feature this post in the 2nd issue of ‘Dodging Rainbows’ on 10th March, with your permission. Three stories this time; a bloggers confession, this glimpse into our laundry basket, and a guy who shows how to do wonderful, fashionable things with palettes(will blow you away). Up for it?

Share your voice

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s