One Sided Love

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When you’re dating someone and you get to that point of using those 3 wonderful words do you think about the other persons response before you say it?

You look this person in their eyes and the feelings bubble up inside you and the words fall out of your mouth like an erupting volcano, “I Love You”.  Two situations can arise; 1) They say, “I love you too” or 2) They say anything other than I love you.


How would you handle either situation?

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14 comments

  1. >Until break down the word LOVE and fully understand who created/creates it, it's purpose; then we'll forever be deceived no matter who says it or not. Some one can say it and not mean it or someone can mean it but not say it. For whatever reason. But Love as our Father gives is constant, never failing, it's not reserved but freely gives itself, it is not based on feelings but a decision, it is unconditional, not persuaded or swayed by circumstance. So whether or not someone SAYS I love you should not define or create instability in your emotions because you would have realized that you HAVE love inside of you. God is love and love is God. And if He lives within, there IS and WILL always be love one for another.

  2. >I'm saying whether no# 1 or #2 occurs the response should be the same. Love them any way with the love that God gave you. That's it. Nothing more nothing less

  3. >Its not that im being too heavenly minded celebrity, im only saying that we, more than we should, take what other people do or DONT do too personal. We allow their actions to dictate how we react or respond. Dont you see the problem in that? we should be so stable and sound that whether someone says i love you or not, it doesnt cause us to feel like we have to react at all. But thats just how i look at it. its only my own opinion. How would you respond to the post?

  4. >Everyone in the world should be loved with the love God has put inside us. So are you saying the person you are in a relationship or marriage with doesn't get any special love more than what a stranger on the street gets? To give that "relationship" type love is giving more of yourself. This is a person you are sharing your inner being with therefore before you give that up most would wonder how its going to be received. I guess you go around loving EVERYONE the same….Nothing special huh?

  5. >:0), no thats not what im saying at all. you asked what would we do if we told some one that we love them and they either say i love you or not at all, i say i would love them any way. and yes thats suppose to go for any one. Of course in a marriage it requires more sacrifice, sacrifice of self producing "special" or different acts than you would someone else, but its love all the same. Im not understanding…how should i have answered the question?

  6. >Anonymous #2…there are things that people do to us that requires an action or at least a level of thinking about the situation. Something simple as this question has nothing to do with someone dictating how we react. You react however YOU so please. #1. If these say I love you too, their actions better align with those words or the relationship will dissolve.#2. If they say something else, I know where we stand and either stay with them or cut my loses and leave. And the choice will be MINE. But I'll probably go with the later, because I'm not in the business of keep men that don't wanna be kept or caring more for people than they care about me.Its the love that you have from God that dictates you making healthy decisions and being in healthy relationships with people. Its the love of God that dictates your actions. If someone says I love you OR not, I'm sure God thinks its okay if you respond to them and handle the situation.

  7. >So with that said, "i" personally would love them anyway, and as far as staying in a relationship,…well let me say marriage because i believe if its just someone you are a dating you have no real reason to feel bonded, but if you are married and your spouse does not say i love you as often as you think they should, or stopped saying it, does not warrant or should not cause you to feel you have to end the marriage. whether or not its healthy to not hear i love you, depends on how the other person see's it. We can see it thru our own carnal eyes for what it looks like or we can see it thru Gods all knowing, all seeing eyes to see it for what itreally is. And God reveals that to the person who seeks to know His truth about the marriage. Well, it was nice speaking with you both. These sort of topics will always be contraversal, but thats ok. Thats what makes us different. Theres no right or wrong answer because each situation is different. Be blessed

  8. >Anonymous #2…I'm not sure what was controversial about it? That your response was challenged? That you made a response to a simple question deeper than a coma? The fact that you mentioned marriage, usually married women think they have superior knowledge on relationships even when they are unhappily married. Have a great day!

  9. >when i read this question, i could have repsonded and said i would love them anyway…but i chose to go further. Because people do face this every day. So instead of just providing the issue i wanted to take it a step further and provide a solution. Since that is my passion. The emotional roller coaster can end, you can get off, but its a state of mind more than anything. I speak on marriage because thats what i know. not that i know it all, i dont claim that, but thru my own experiences i speak on what i have learned and continue to learn. And i apologize if i made you feel as if i am superior in my knowledge. Forgive me if i did. ok, let me just unmask this whole conversation…i know that the fact that my comments are under anonymous doesnt take away from the fact that you may know who i am. I also know that had the response been made by someone else it probably would have been a whole different outcome. its ok because i know my current situation better than anyone else, yes, im not ashamed to love my husband unconditionally, and im not ashamed of my past any longer. But i stand by what i believe and how i believe, no matter what others may have said concerning me or my marriage. I AM happy in my marriage because my source of happiness is not dependant upon anyone person. My source of happiness comes from God because i know what he has told me. I cant speak for what he tells anyone else and as i stated each situation is different. I dont think the same as i used to so i apologize if my response was unclear. My angle was to show that you shouldnt give another person the power to control your happiness, they dont get to decide that. We may not control how they act or what they do but we do get to decide how we respond. Theres too much negativity in life already to add to it. Whos right, whos wrong. My relationship failed so i cant wait to see someone elses fail. im unhappy so they should be unhappy and how dare they if they are. i gave up on love so now i look at others as if they are stupid and niave for hanging on. The moment we see someone else trying to accomplish something we try our hardest to pull them back down. why? whats the point? tearing them down every chance we get. spreading their business and sowing seeds of discord so that we can validate our own bitterness. taking things that have nothing to do with us mroe personal than we should. we get offended when others decide to think on a higher, claiming that they think they're better. its sad to me because we all have the potential and the ability to have our own lasting relationship. its just that some are willing to put in the work until the very end and some arent. but dont bash the one that does. LadyJ, im not saying this to hurt you but i pray that we all deal with our hurt and get to the root of it. i pray that God heals every wound that has been caused by any man or woman. i know you hav been disappointed and scarred but trust me i am not your enemy. Not any more. i have been hurt just like you and you now that so why would i add to it? i am woman just like you. i made it my decision to beat the stereotypes that women cant get along, that theyre always competing and jealous, that they cant be happy for one another. thats a lie from hell. and i refuse to except that. i wish you both well, and i love you with the love of christ no matter how you choose to feel about me. this will be my last response because what i have been called to do is not to offend or cause a debate, but to promote healing of the heart, to rebuild those that have been beaten down and to rebuild relationships…..even if it means i sacrifice my own. Lord i know im not put on earth to be liked by everyone, i may even be ridiculed. nevertheless,Not my will Lord but thy will be done

  10. >Since you wish to put me personally in this I can let you know I was not at all hurt by any of your comments because they don't pertain to me. You have now basically revealled what YOU THINK & that's your own OPINION, your entitled. I have been hurt in the past but have grown past it. I wish hurt & pain on no one.The purpose of this blog is to discuss all things relationship, good, bad & indifferent. Problems are everywhere & if we talk about them we can discuss resolution. There is no problem with you providing a solution but there's a correct way & forum to do so. This was not a problematic post it was simply a question of do you consider a persons response before revealing your feelings to them & how would you respond depending on their response to you. Eventually you did answer the question, Thanks!Be careful about how you try to share information because doing it in the wrong way can do more harm than good even when it was meant harmlessly.

  11. >Ummm, I, Ummmm… ok. Ummm,… Well. Me personally, I have been in one-sided relationships where I cared/loved more than I received. Now, I just hold my tongue until my lady tells me she loves me 1st! I love in action, and understand a woman wants to hear it, feel it, and see. Emphasis on "hearing". Phew!!! How did I do? LMBO!!!

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